"Hey, new students. Welcome to a special double-tip episode. You know that feeling when your regular teacher is out? The room smells different? The desk feels... hostile? That’s the Substitute Zone. But what if I told you that the Substitute’s power is nothing compared to the ancient evil that lives three floors down? I’m talking about the Lost-and-Found. Today, we learn to survive the Fill-In and retrieve your soul—I mean, your jacket—before it’s too late."

"Ned Bigby. Open your textbook to page 42. We are doing long division. No talking. No ferrets."

Belvedoni claps his hands. "Alright, carbon units. Today we explore interpretive geometry . Please bend your protractors into the shape of your inner sadness."

"See you next week. Bring a calculator. And maybe a will."

He opens his well-worn, spiral-bound notebook. Tip #47 is crossed out with “SUB” written over it. Tip #48 is smeared with what looks like ketchup.

"No one enters the Abyss without a claim ticket or a tear in their eye." Moze: "I lost a hair elastic in 2006." Gordon: "Provide a detailed sketch, and I will consider it." The Setpiece: The Sub Meets the Abyss Desperate for his hoodie (it has his only pen), Ned convinces Belvedoni that "interpretive geometry" is best explored in the basement. The entire class follows, turning the Lost-and-Found into a makeshift classroom.

Belvedoni sees the Lost-and-Found bin and weeps. "It’s beautiful. A museum of forgotten potential." "Sir, do not touch the Deep Zone. That ferret is a biter."

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